Frankly In Love

Frankly In Love
Written by David Yoon
Contemporary, Romance, Diverse
432 Pages
Published September 17th 2019
Thanks to Penguin Australia
Add to Goodreads
★★★★
Frank loves Joy. Joy loves Frank. At least, that's what they tell their parents.

Frank Li is a high school senior living in Southern California. Frank's parents emigrated from Korea, and have pretty much one big rule for Frank, he must only date Korean girls. But he's got strong feelings for a girl in his class, Brit and she's not Korean. His friend Joy Song is in the same boat and knows her parents will never accept her boyfriend, so they make a pact. They'll pretend to date each other in order to gain their freedom. Frank thinks fake dating is the perfect plan, but it leaves him wondering if he ever really understood love or himself at all.

David Yoon's debut novel is a quirky, authentic, heartbreaking romantic comedy and a refreshingly different take on race, immigrant communities, friendship and family.
In accordance with his parents, Frank Li is destined for greatness. Frank will be accepted into the college. Frank will date a lovely Korean girl from an honoured family. Frank will be wealthy and successful. Frank will also marry Korean girl and have Korean children and thus the Korean circle of life continues. Frank knows very little about the lives of his parents before they immigrated to America, his mother and father are peaceful, humble people who have worked tirelessly to provide for their children, Frank and older sister Hanna.

Self confessed nerd Frank barely speaks Korean, born in America and wavering between identifying as Korean and American but never quite fitting in. Each week Korean families congregate for The gathering, each family hosting a Korean banquet and allocating time to socialise and catch up with other Korean Americans who have created a new life for their families, small business owners basking in their own success. While the adults gather, their American born offspring talk about colleges, video games and dating. All except Hanna. Hanna who was once the perfect Korean daughter until she started dating Miles, an African American young man she met at college.

So when Frank starts dating Brit, he knows he can never tell his parents. Brit is white and doesn't fit into Frank's Korean world and after seeing his sister Hanna ostracised for her relationship with Miles, Frank knows Brit wouldn't be welcome within his family.

Frank isn't the most likeable of characters but he's incredibly genuine and authentic. He's keenly aware that his parents hold a deep prejudice towards other Asian identities, African Americans and those of Mexican decent. They stereotype, use terms like ching chong when describing those with a Chinese background, make assumptions about African Americans and Mexican identities as being single mothers or felons and fought endlessly with Hanna who continued to challenge their racism until she was ostracised for not dating a Korean man. Frank on the other hand is too scared to make waves. He calls them out on their racism but halfheartedly. It's easier for him to ignore their prejudice than to challenge them. So when he starts dating Brit, he doesn't give his parents the opportunity to surprise him but instead hides her like a dirty secret and she deserved so much more.

Considering the current social media call out culture and microaggressions, I think it's an important aspect of discussion that Frank didn't push back against his parents. Racism exists and it can be deeply ingrained into families of any background or culture. What happens when you're the teen of racist parents? If you listen to most adults on social media such as Twitter, they expect you to rage against the injustice of the world but what they don't often realise that you can only push back so much against parents or authoritarian figures. Twitter doesn't care if you suddenly find yourself out on your ass with no where to go. I found Frank's situation completely reasonable and although I wish he'd given his parents the benefit of the doubt regarding Brit, I can understand why it was easier for him to simply ignore their casual racism and stereotyping. Ignoring racism for your own self preservation is not the same as condoning the actions of those who are being racist.

I love a fake romance narrative and Joy Song was such a lovely character. She was brutally honest, hilariously funny and in much the same situation as Frank, only wealthier. Joy is Korean American and dating Wu, a tall, dark and handsome Chinese American athlete and has kept their relationship hidden from her parents for the past two years. As a workaround, Joy and Frank pretend to begin dating to keep their parents happy and as an alibi to date Wu and Brit respectively. Pretending to date Joy is easy. She's a hard working, intelligent young woman from a good Korean family and fake dating Joy allows Frank a freedom he's never known before.

The secondary characters were fabulous, especially Frank's banter with best friend Q. Q is African American, a nerd, highly intelligent and speaks as though he's an extra on Downtown Abbey. Unfortunately as Frank explores his new relationship, Q is the one who ultimately suffers. He needed more from Frank and allowed his friend to take advantage of his kindness.

The ending is bittersweet and reiterates the importance of family. Frank learns that the easier path isn't always the happiest and perhaps anything worth having is worth the fight. Frankly In Love is an incredibly important read, besides being engaging and entertaining, it highlights how we're all capable of racism, microaggressions and stereotyping regardless of our backgrounds, culture or the colour of our skin. Brilliant debut!

30 comments

  1. I've been hearing a lot about this book lately. I've been real curious!I love that it has all the diversity and great secondary characters. wonderful review :)

    Uma@Books.Bags.Burgers.

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    1. Thanks Uma. It's such an entertaining and thought provoking read. I love flawed and realistic characters and it was a wonderful insight into the lives of the hardworking migrant American family. Really enjoyed it.

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  2. I’ve seen a lot of buzz about this one but the reviews I’ve read have been mixed. Some seemed to have a big problem with the racism. You bring up a good point about how much autonomy Frank has as a teenager, though. Yes it’s easy to say that one must stand up against racism, but what about when you’re young and the people spouting the racism are your parents? How far can you really push?

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    1. It's such an interesting point isn't it. We know the harm and hurt that racism has throughout our diverse communities but I think we tend to forget that not everyone is in a position to die on that hill. Knowing how harmful it is but not being in a position to remove yourself from the situation isn't the same as condoning the actions of a racist. Growing up with Asian friends, I know how heavily emphasised it is to respect your parents as well. it's a double edged sword really and shows that not every situation is black and white.

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  3. This is such a wonderful, balanced review Kelly! I loved reading this book as well but I was really frustrated with Frank's actions towards Brit and Q. I love how you explained not pushing back against his parents.

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    1. I was too. It felt as though he was mirroring his parents in that regard but I think his parents were able to grow and learn as people in the end. I had seen a few reviews before starting this one that mentioned how Frank should have fought his parents which is unrealistic, honouring your parents is such an important part of many cultures and sometimes a gentle hand is more effective in helping people see their prejudice.

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  4. This review is absolutely spectacular, Kelly!
    I've read bits and pieces here and there that focus on how certain cultures and races like their children to only date within said race or culture, and this is clearly no different.
    You hit some incredibly important nails on their heads - Twitter doesn't care if you end up on the street because you pushed back too much. And sometimes self preservation is the only thing that gets people through their days.
    I feel badly for Hanna, though.
    I'm eager to read this book so I can see if I think that it lives up to the hype in my mind.
    Thank you for sharing such an incredible review!

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    1. Thank you so much Star! It's a wonderful conversation starter about culture and also the balance between respecting your parents and making decisions for yourself. What I found interesting is that Frank's journey comes full circle, he chooses easier options then becomes the more difficult choice himself. I'd like to think he character learnt from that.

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  5. This was a fab review!! So informative!! I was totally on the fence about this book because I don't read a lot of romance-based books, but now I definitely want to read it. And I SO agree with what you said about Twitter. I think if you are a person who is on Twitter a lot, it can be easy to forget that that world is not real life. It's so easy for keyboard warriors to tell teens that they MUST do this or THAT to stand up for injustice, but they aren't out there living their lives. Not everyone is in a situation where they can outwardly challenge everything they deem wrong. Sometimes you gotta live to fight another day-- and that means doing what is best for you. Thanks again for the review!

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    1. Thanks so much Michelle for your kind words and I couldn't agree more. You have to choose your battles and not being in a position to push back isn't the same as condoning prejudice or racism. Really looking forward to seeing what you think of it!

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  6. Wonderful review. I appreciate all your thoughts about Frank's parents being racist. It's definitely one thing to not push back against parents and actually being racist yourself. Yes, it's uncomfortable to hear or read about, but I think it's an important distinction to make.

    -Lauren
    www.shootingstarsmag.net

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    1. It is Lauren. This is such a wonderful read that ignites discussion, I'd love to see what you think of it!

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  7. I've been wavering on whether or not I want to read this one, but I think this review finally pushed me onto the side of "I should at least check it out." Thanks for sharing your thoughts!

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    1. I hope you do Jordan, such an entertaining read. Would love to see your thoughts on it!

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  8. I started and DNFed this audiobook, but I feel like I should try to read it, because maybe it was the narrator, who turned me off. I am very interested in the topics he takes on, and I am willing to try again, because of positive reviews like this. Great review! Fingers crossed the book works better for me.

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    1. I hope so! I'm not much of an audiobook person but I know a narrator can really make or break a book. I hope the physical copy works better for you, would love to see how they compare!

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  9. I forget sometimes that racism can flourish in families of any ethnicity and colour, and different cultures have their own type of racism in a way. I feel for Frank, and Joy having to do what they did, and still am happy they got some happiness out of it because it is so hard to stand up against family. Your reviews always give me such food for thought Kelly!

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    1. It's not something we see often in young adult and an aspect I found fascinating. It was so well written, really enjoyed it.

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  10. I've seen this book everywhere but your review has now convinced me to actually add it to my TBR lol :D

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    1. I think you'll really enjoy this one Noel, looking forward to seeing what you think of it.

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  11. AHHH! I SO ANT TO READ THIS ONE! I had only seen the book trailer and it honestly gave a different idea than what you mentioned, but now I'm intrigued even more! I am curious if Frank and Joy end up together. I'd like to think they ended up with the partner they had before the fake dating.

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    1. Ooh I haven't seen the book trailer, I'll have to check it out. Can't wait to see what you think of it!

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  12. I read this one earlier this month and wasn't a fan. I didn't care for the dialogue (it felt a bit unrealistic to me), and I didn't like how Frank or Joy handle their relationships. I can see how this might feel authentic, but it really put me off the story as a whole. I'm happy it worked for you! It seems like you were able to find more good in the book. :)

    Lindsi @ Do You Dog-ear? 💬

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    1. The relationship aspect was an issue for me as well but I liked how it came full circle in the end, a dose of karma for Frank. I was hoping for a solid ending and more growth from Frank though.

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  13. I've been wanting to try this one because it tackles so many timely topics. I had read a couple of mixed reviews early on but your review has me convinced that it's probably a book that would really resonate with me.

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    1. There's a few issues that felt a little unresolved but overall it was an entertaining read. I'd love to see what you think of it Suzanne.

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  14. I'm so keen to get my hands on a copy of this.
    Fantastic review Kelly.

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  15. I've seen this book about a bunch and admit it's probably not one I'l read, but I do agree that it's showing a very important point about racism. I think we all have come across someone in our lives who is casually racist and who we're hesitant to call out on it but what do you do when that person is a parent or someone with authority over you? I'm all for teaching people better, but it's a tough situation to be in and it seems this book handles that well.

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    1. It would be a difficult situation to navigate especially as a teen and when it's someone like a parent. Frank did mention to them how their comments were racist but at that point, his parents didn't see how harmful it was. I'm looking forward to seeing some own voices reviews for this one and seeing their take on the narrative.

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