ACOWAR: A Most Excellent Bogan Book Review

A Court of Wings and Ruin
A Court of Thorns and Roses Book Three
Written by Sarah J Maas
Fantasy, Romance, New Adult
720 Pages
Published 2nd May 2017
Thank you to Bloomsbury Australia
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★★★★
Feyre has returned to the Spring Court, determined to gather information on Tamlin's manoeuvrings and the invading king threatening to bring Prythian to its knees. But to do so she must play a deadly game of deceit  and one slip may spell doom not only for Feyre, but for her world as well.

As war bears down upon them all, Feyre must decide who to trust amongst the dazzling and lethal High Lords and hunt for allies in unexpected places.
Our sheila Feyre is back and a bad arsed. She's finally gone and got herself a spine and has returned to Tamlin's shithole Spring Court, ballsy and ready to pull the wool over their eyes by leaving them up shit creek without a paddle. Mate, they've got Buckley's. Tamlin is still a wanker and beating his chest like it'll impress the sheila's and Feyre isn't having a bar of that. So once Feyre knows what that shifty prick is up to she's all hooroo dickheads, I'm going back to my hot man. Until Lucien pulls a swifty and says, I've got the hots for your sister, she's my mate and the two set off on a ripper of an adventure.

Shit's about to hit the fan. Rhysand is growling up a storm mate and the King is chucking a tanty. You see, this bloke is a bit ambitious and the greedy bastard wants to take over everything. Because the Night Court is a ripper, they're having none of that and plan on taking him on. Fistycuffs and all.

That Maas chick is shit hot right now, the sheila knows how to spin a tale and it's pretty fucking epic. Knocked my socks right off. Feyre is as cunning as a shithouse rat now, a sly sheila that's thinking bugger this shit and takes the bull by the horns. Of course it'll take a chick to get shit done. Fark oath mate.

Which brings me to why I'm speaking in bogan. For most Aussies, everyone is mate. See Dano over there? He's me mate. Robbo? Mate. Pulling at the pub on a Friday? That's not a mate, that's just pulling. I get it. Feyre and Rhysand are hot for each other and having a shag in the back paddock but fair go, when you're in the middle of epic fisticuffs with a deranged whacker, keep it in your pants son. There's a time and place to go hammer and tongs.

Translation

I really enjoyed it. Sarah J Maas is a wonderfully accomplished storyteller. Emotional and captivating.

33 comments

  1. HAH! Love all the slang - I understood most of it, so hey!! I haven't read any of these books but I need to try them out sometime. I'm glad you enjoyed this one. :)

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    1. Just trying to keep it fresh Lauren. I was inspired by the overuse of the word mate actually so thought it was only fitting to give my review a little Aussie flair.

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  2. LOL. I didn't understand so much of this, but I got the gist of it and loved it!

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    1. Thanks sweetheart. Sometimes you just need to get your Aussie slang on.

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  3. Stone the flamin crows Kelly, that was epic. But seriously great review and totally agree about mate and keeping it in their pants. There is a time and place for everything and the middle of a battlefield really isn't it

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    1. Holy shit, they're having a shag while in the middle of a battlefield. Alf Stewart wouldn't have a bar of that.

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    2. This review, Kells, may just be the best thing I've stumbled across! Gosh, you're freaking amazing!! :D

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  4. LMAO that review was epic and funny as hell.

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    1. Thanks Mary, you're all right shelia. Thanks for rockin' up.

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  5. Oath mate this review was everything I needed in my life XD Feyre and her block were a bit of alright but they're inner circle mates were my fave <3

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    1. You need those drongos as mates, who else is gonna tell you when your fly's undone and your meat and veg have sprung free.

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  6. *dies laughing*

    That's all I got for now.

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  7. Bloody oath! I admit, I cackled hahaha

    Randomly, wanker is so my favourite word. I use it on the daily (almost always while driving).

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    1. Maaaaate, I'm a fan. Prick is another I use regularly. It's super versatile.

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  8. Maaaaaaate, BEST REVIEW EVER!
    No seriously, that was awesome. I was grinning the whole time.

    As for the book; I really need to hurry up and start this series.

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    1. Thanks little shelia and yes you do mate, get ready for fisticuffs and vigorously unrealistic shagging. But you'll love every moment.

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  9. I would like to see how a King threw a tanty, like on the floor or just a royal tanty. Fair Dinkum review, i just wished it came with tim tams

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    1. And a coldie to crack. Possibly a snag from Bunnings.

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  10. hehe! I'm so proud of myself for understanding most of this lol

    I have the first book but still need to read it.

    For What It's Worth

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  11. MAAAAAATE. Hahaha I was able to discern a fair amount of what that meant, but alas I am not fluent in Australian slang 😅
    This was such a fun idea for a book review, I loved it!

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    1. Thanks Kris, you're a beaut shelia. I owe you a beer mate.

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  12. Had to get me flannie and moccies on to read this one. Fair doos, this review is a bit of all right.

    (He's got Buckley's is one of my favourite sayings, very Melbourne-centric).

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    1. 1. Must wear flannie at all times.
      2. See above.

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  13. Yooooooo 😅😅😅😅😅😅
    I am dead! I keep waiting for my sister to talk like this and so far she's only disappointed me. Teach her your ways, Kells!

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    1. You mean she's not already? Has she at least developed a taste for Vegemite? I think you should trade places with her. I'll Aussiefy you within three days.

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  14. This is bloody brilliant! You had me grinning the whole time, what a funny review! Not to mention apt, the overuse of 'mate' was bound to set any Aussie off :)

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    1. Maaate, it was was flogged to death. I get that you're hot for it but give it a rest root rats.

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  15. And how about that drop bear under the library? And the flamin' bird queen? And I always knew Amren was really a bunyip. Great review!

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    1. Definitely can't forget the drop bears ;)

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  16. I love this so much 😂😂 Excellent review ;)

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  17. ...I understood every single thing you said omg. That was incredible. ♥

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